I remember at school we had to cover all our books with wrapping paper-I'm not exactly sure why. Maybe they wanted us to release our inner creative being as if we were some pre-school interior designer: 'darling, I love what you've done with 'Adventures in Physics, volume 1'...the 'Happy 21st birthday' wrapping paper really works with that massive blue felt-tip smiley face don't you think?'
The real reason was that teachers suspected we were physically incapable of not drawing on anything: 'quick, cover your books, draw on that, draw on that, no not on Sally's face, on the cover...'
Obviously in practice this doesn't work, unless you cover all the tables, all the lockers, the walls, the floor, the ceiling, everyone else...until it looks like you've walked into a very bad version of Art Attack.
But what if we subtly amended the covers of the books we read now like we used to do? Here are some of the books you could be reading on the train today:
Engineering Works on the Orient Express
All Quiet on the Northern Line (probably due to aforementioned engineering works)
James and the Giant Mortgage
Dave's Blue World (by Aldus 'Cameron' Huxley)
Oliver's Pissed (or the new sequel now out called 'Oliver's Pissed Again!')
Beer and Loathing in Bognor Regis
If on a Winter's Night I had some Heating (by Italo 'my gosh it's cold in here' Calvino)
iClaudius (Apple are currently claiming the rights of the original)
The Hair Dryer, the Bitch, and her Wardrobe
Classic literature updated for the modern generation.
